In 2009 for Thanksgiving I made a trip to the East Coast, to work and visit family. My trip was refreshing -- I finally took time to read a lengthy book, something I'd neglected for too long, and I managed to meet up with two of my close friends in DC. Spending relaxed time reading, walking along the creek at the end of my family's street, experiencing a true Virginia fall, and reconnecting with friends, all combined to make my trip rewarding and emotionally uplifting.
When I returned to Los Angeles, where I lived at the time, I felt better than I had in a long time. I'd been battling depression for several years at least, and it isn't a pleasant battle. The positive experiences on my trip served to lift my spirits and give me new energy.
The night after I got back, I smoked an entire joint (of some high-quality outdoor Headband x Afgoo). Smoking the entire joint was a bit much. Usually I smoke about half, tamp it out, then later pick it up and finish. This joint, though, was so delicious and enjoyable I just plowed through the whole thing. Meanwhile the screensaver called Electric Sheep had started up.
The Electric Sheep screensaver is special -- it's a "networked" screensaver, something I've never encountered before. It displays "sheep" -- shifting fractal patterns of colored light. Each computer running the screensaver participates in rendering one frame of each "sheep"; each frame is one fractal image. Recall that fractals are geometric shapes which exhibit self-similarity; at any level of zoom, the structure and pattern is the same. These shapes are ubiquitous in nature: galactic filaments, coastlines, mountains, clouds, snowflakes, shells, and flowers. When your computer finishes rendering that fractal frame, it sends it to the "sheep server", which pastes together all the frames it has received from all the computers running Electric Sheep. The server then distributes those "sheep" for everyone to download and enjoy. And the cycle continues. The Electric Sheep live on.
The special feature is that you can vote on the designs -- press Up if you like it, Down if you don't. The screensaver then communicates with all the other computers running it and uses those votes to adjust the designs, using a genetic algorithm to mutate and breed the best "sheep" (designs) to create new sheep. Additionally, users can consciously create their own sheep and upload them to the service. The flock evolves and we enjoy the evolution and new variations. These sheep often resemble the solar system, living cells, and other mesmerizingly dazzling natural designs.
My enlightenment occurred while staring entranced at the shapes, colors, and lines, of the Electric Sheep. I realized that I am connected to all the other people who are watching the sheep at the same time, around the world. We are all watching the light patterns that we all helped to create. We influence the outcome by our votes. Just as many religions teach, we are One with each other, and with God. God is Energy, and Energy is God. Mass is Energy, and Energy is Mass. E=MC2. This was my revelation, that what some term God, I term Energy. They are one and the same, infinite, magnificent, and I am literally the same stuff as Him. The computer runs on energy, the sheep are composed of light. My matter is energy, and if energy can be light waves, then my matter can be as well. So in both a metaphysical and the most basic physical sense, I and everyone are purely creatures of light, which is to say, creatures of God.
In the beginning and the end, all the particles in the universe are from the same original energy of the Big Bang. All was once unimaginable energy, and then transformed to matter, which is simply a denser form of that energy. We all will eventually return to that energy, as our bodies are cremated or decay, the matter converted to energy used in other natural processes.
Although marijuana was not the source of my enlightenment, it certainly was a catalyst for my new sight, knowledge, and spirit. That is one of the main reasons I enjoy cannabis as much as I do -- it provides a way for the mind to see new things, or old things in a new way. In my case, it allowed my mind to transcend the present moment, to connect the present moment with remote moments and all moments, to connect the present place with remote places and all places. To connect my matter and my energy with all matter and all energy. It is a link between the natural, the technical, and the spiritual. And I am forever grateful for what it helped me see.
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